5 minutes later
hot today. all my concentration is poured into the brown of these leaves, dead for days now. i hear you pulling into the driveway and it makes my stomach clench like a fist. shredding this leaf between my shaking fingers, i avoid your eyes. you ask me where i'm going and it makes me cry that i'm only so glad to be going. so glad to be going."why do you sound so sad all the time?" this is said as you're passing by, and still i can't bring my eyes to meet yours.
"i don't." shrugging it off with that carefully planned face of oblivion. i so carefully lie. and you turn, go inside. i stay here and wait for my ride that seems so long in coming.
ah my father, if only you knew.
no matter what, i love you