oh, the drama!
"this exhausts me. i want no more emotion, no more show of human weakness and indecency, no more softness filling in the spaces between bone and flesh, no more feelings.
...i want logic. i want truth. i want fact and reality, cold and hard, and i want the crude edge of a pencil against plain white paper, flowing, and telling of these elements which exist outside of ourselves. i want objectivity. i want to sit and think for awhile without being bombarded by my own pallid excuse for a heart...."