if only you knew
today is just a wednesday and to me it's just another day too. school, i despise. i can't think straight, i've been walking in circles trying to figure out a way to get some rest, but all i get is more confused. and even my writing doesn't make sense, which makes everything 10 times worse. i've got bits and pieces of things running through my head and i can't find a place to calm down and be ok. tonight i need somebody and there's no one. even the people i always turn to, the ones i can always always count on, aren't there. for some reason or another. nothing turns my head anymore. my mum told me i need to do something fun yet i can't think of a single thing that sounds like a good time to me. and that's such a lonely feeling. i don't even want to eat mcdonalds french fries or watch my favorite movies or feed the ducks at the park or go to the beach or cook dinner or ANYTHING. i'm too tired tonight, all that i'm writing is a bunch of crap because i can't get my real feelings out.